All my life i have had to prove myself to people. My family when i was young. I was smaller than everyone else. In school, i was always told i can't. with the exceptions of Ms. Eichenlaub who i adore and is the reason i am a musician, Ms. White who taught me that no matter what anyone thinks i can do whatever i put my mind to, and Mr. o'Hara who told me that if you fail, it isn't the end, there are more things to fail at in life, so take what you can do and make that better, and take what you fail at and never let it be the end!
All my life i have had to prove myself to people. They told me i was shooting too high when i said i wantd to go to eastman. When i was 10 in summer camp, they told me i was a wanna be white kid and that white kids can't run fast and be track stars. I was told by my uncle that i couldn't sing. I got into eastman, i beat everyone in races at summer camp, i got into school of the arts not by trumpet, but by a singing audition.
Now in my life there are bigger issues. Things that people say about me when they don't even really know who I am. These things have only made me stronger. People have been brainwashed in this country to think that the amount of money you make will determine your security for someone. Heart and drive and hope doesn't stand for much these days. Being kicked out of school due to SEVERE anxiety and depression, loosing a person you loved more than the world itself then finding the courage to over come it and still be best friends, finding work, aqiring new skills, become something people said you cannot, gaining strength, overcoming depression, choosing not to kill yourself that one night, loosing 45 pounds, getting better at your passion, and many more things that have happened to me and i have overcome in the past year and a half just don't seem to matter to some people....because they never took the time to understand who Devon Tramell really is. I cannot be upset anymore. They are the ones who are missing out. I'm going to still lead my life, trying to be the best person i can be. i am far from perfect, and i will make mistakes, but your fire only makes me stronger.
I'm not looking for any sympathy, and a lot of that most people or no one knew. It's just what is on my mind. My words are my liberation from the pain and hurt i have experienced in my life. I want you to know that i am better than i was then. I am free. I am going to be just fine. My life is great now. i have everything i need. materials mean nothing to me. I have my health, I have people who care about me. People who actually call me or get in touch with me because they care. I have some of my family. I am stronger now than i ever have been in my entire life. i can finally say i truly am one with my soul. My tears have mended my woes for the last time.
I now know i have nothing to prove to anyone. but to end this blog i say this..... If you really care about the people you know, let them know it from time to time. It doesn't have to be a holiday, or thier birthday, just call them and let them know that you care and that you appreciate who they are. Good for your Karma!!haha. good day to all!
